Oh! My Brother!

Chapter 6


All Oh! My Goddess (Ah! My Goddess, Aa! Megami-sama, whatever) characters
owned by Kosuke Fujishima.  I'm poor, don't sue me.

***

There are days Urd REALLY irritates me, you know?

I woke up late the next morning, and found this note tacked to my door:

     Chris

     She'll be in the caf. at noon.
     Be there, or be Keiichi.

                   Hugs and Kisses,

                               Urd.

I stared at the note for a few minutes.  *Way to make a good impression,
Urd, pass notes like we're in elementary school.*  I checked the clock.
11:30.  Great, I had just enough time for me to clean up and get over there.
I spent the next half an hour getting cleaned up and cursing under my
breath, and flew over to the school.  I ran into the cafeteria, and saw
Rachel sitting there.

"Hi," I said, running up, "sorry about this."  Rachel looked at me blankly
for a moment, and then her eyes brightened in recognition.

"Chris, right?" she asked me, smiling.  "Looking for another book?"

I frowned in confusion.  "Didn't you get a note asking you to be here?"

She laughed.  I idly noted that it was a very nice laugh.  "Why would I get
a note, I always eat here!"  I heard a whistle and looked over in the
direction it came from.  There was Urd, holding that damn envelope,
Belldandy standing beside her.  I got the message easily enough.  *I would
have known that if I looked at that portfolio.*  I muttered several curses
involving meddlesome goddesses.

"Uhh...Rachel?" If it was a choice between getting shot down and Urd's
helping me, I'd take my chances with the girl.  "Would you like to go out
sometime?"

Obviously I startled her, because she became very flustered.  "OK, that was
out of the blue," she stalled.  "Hmm..." she looked me up and down.  I hate
it when girls do that, it makes me feel like I'm some hunk of meat on sale.
"Maybe."

*Oh great, just keep me hanging,* one part of me said.  *Would you rather
she said no?* another part countered.  *Not particularly,* the first
responded.  I have to stop having these conversations with myself.  "Maybe?"

"Well...I don't know much about you, other than the fact you have a little
sister who goes to college with you and you can't stand arts profs."  She
looked me up and down again, and I felt myself blush.  "How about we talk?"
I sat down and we were soon talking.

Out of the corner of my eye, I caught Belldandy resignedly handing something
to a grinning Urd.  *Great, they're making bets on my love life.*

***

As I was on my way to my afternoon class, I felt a familiar arm snake itself
around my waist.  "So how'd it go, 'Niichan?"

I tried to give Urd a glare, and failed miserably.  "Urd, I don't know when,
and I don't know how, but someday I'll get you for that."

"I take it things went well?" she asked innocently.

"You mean you WEREN'T eavesdropping?" I asked, honestly surprised.

She pouted.  "What kind of girl do you take me for?"

"A nosy one?" I deadpanned.  "The day you don't eavesdrop is the day Skuld
stops eating ice cream."

"Hey, it worked didn't it?" she demanded. "You have a date for Friday night,
after all."  She slapped her hand over her mouth as she realized the blunder
she made.

I smiled smugly. "I thought you weren't eavesdropping."

"I wasn't eavesdropping," she insisted with a pained tone.  "I was
lip-reading."

"Same difference."

***

My life was going great, wasn't it?  You're probably bored out of your
skull.  I am, and I'm writing this.  Unfortunately, some bright-eyed maniac
(named Skuld) decided right about now would be the perfect time for me to
start learning about one of my other duties.  Namely, wish bringing.

One of these days I'm really going to have to take a look at the code for
the selection of worthy candidates for wishes.  There has GOT to be some
problems with that code.  It's like it was made to cause trouble, especially
if it's your first wish.

Cases in point: Belldandy's first wish ended up with her LIVING with the
recipient (not that she minds).  Skuld's first wish ended up with the trio
gaining a big brother (not that any of them mind, as far as I know).  Just
thinking about what kind of trouble Urd's first wish might have been keeps
me up nights.

Lucky me, mine wasn't going to be any better.

So I'm flying along, irritated with the fact that I have to land every few
miles to get my bearings (give me a break, navigating Tokyo's a pain), and
promising myself to figure out a way to get a CD player to work in no-time
if it's the last thing I do, when I finally find the lucky girl sitting in a
park.

Crying.

*Of course she's crying," I mentally complained.  *A nice, cheerful girl
with an easy wish would be too much to ask, wouldn't it?*  I landed a few
dozen meters away and watched her for a moment.

To be honest, she looked a little too fragile right now to deal with a truly
impressive entrance.  But then, most people are too fragile to deal with my
entrances.  Not that I know why, I'd think a guy just appearing out of thin
air would be easier to take then some girl stepping out of a mirror,
television or even a puddle....but no, I get the screams, not them.
Belldandy says it has something to do with the fact I'm tall and reasonably
well built, but I think she's just trying to be nice.

Back to the girl, I noticed a couple quick things.  One, she seemed to be a
little dressed up.  Not like she was going somewhere, she just looked like
she was trying to make a good impression.   Nice, but not dressy.  A
cellular phone lay on the ground in front of her.

Two, she kept on looking at the various couples in the park wistfully, and
each time she went back into a new round of tears.  Obviously, she just
broke up with a guy or something.  Not good, she might be a little
vindictive on the wish.  I wasn't really up to hurting someone right then.

Three, she was CUTE.  I don't mean like Rachel, who while not being
classically beautiful, had this quality about her that took my breath away.
I mean like...like...well, I don't know who she was like.  She was short,
roughly Belldandy's height, and had a rather well-rounded figure, to put it
politely (to put it rudely, um...WOW).  Her large hazel eyes were liquid
with the tears that glistened in them, and tears ran down her high
cheekbones.  Her red-brown hair curled about her shoulders loosely, and she
chewed on a lock of it.

As I endeavored to think clean thoughts (I'm male, I'm single, I'm 21 - take
it from there), I checked myself over.  I was a god, after all, I've got to
make a good impression.  Black jeans, green dress shirt over a white
T-shirt, dark green trenchcoat, and shades.  Oh yeah, I'm the image of a
god, all right.  If you believe that, I've got some nice bridges to sell
you.

I walked over to the girl, and my trenchcoat billowed in the breeze around
me, in what I thought was a rather impressive effect. But then, I'm biased.
I let my shadow fall over the girl.  As she looked up, I held out my
handkerchief.  "You look like you need this, miss."

She looked at my offering blankly for a long moment, then sniffled and
silently took it out of my hands.  She dabbed at her eyes, and regained
control over herself, giving me a weak smile.  "Thank you," she said.

"Like I said, you looked like you needed it," I responded easily, careful to
not make light of her tears with my tone, and gave her a sincere smile.
"You also look like you need someone to talk to."  She gave me a suspicious
look, and I quickly elaborated.  "Hey, I'm from the Goddess Relief Office."
I hate that name.

"What kind of weirdo are you?" she demanded angrily, standing up and taking
a couple steps back.

*This is going fantastic,* I thought to myself.  I held my hands up in
surrender.  "You just made a phone call, and got a weird wrong number,
right?"  She looked at me with surprise and fear, and I knew I was right.
"Well, it wasn't a wrong number.  You have been chosen, Ami Tokomi, to
recieve a wish."  What, you're surprised I knew her name?  Give me SOME
credit, we always get dossiers on wish recipients.  I stood, and bowed
slightly.  "And I'm the god who's going to grant it."

"H-how did you know my name?" she stammered fearfully, and took a few more
steps away.  "What's going on?"

I sighed.  She wasn't taking this well.  "Let's start over," I said, and
tried my most disarming smile, holding out my hand.  "Chris Angel, pleased
to meet you."  She looked at my hand like it was a live snake, and ever so
slowly reached out and shook it.  I kept my grip as gentle as I possibly
could.  "Ami, I'm a god.  I'm here to grant you a wish.  Do you understand
that?"

"You're God," she answered in a whisper.  I couldn't help it, I laughed.
She started, and then relaxed as she realized I was laughing like she had
made a joke.

"Not quite.  I'm A god, not THE God."  She blithely continued on, accepting
my response at face value.

"And I get a wish."

By George, I think she's got it!  "Yes, you get a wish."

"Anything I want?  Like anything?" she asked eagerly.  There was a feral
gleam in her eyes now.

Whoa, hold your horses, this was starting to get scary.  I recalled this
girl was on the rebound from SOMETHING, and I was rather sure she would
regret making a wish on the spot like that.  "Please think carefully about
your wish.  You have a chance to do something wonderful for yourself or
others, don't waste it on something petty."  She deflated a bit.  Right then
there was a very lucky man out there.  "I've got time.  Make your choice
carefully."  She screwed up her face in concentration.  After a few moments,
my curiosity got the better of me.  "Ami, if I may ask, why were you
crying?"

Man, I should have read that dossier they gave me instead of flipping
through it.  It took some time for me to coax the full story out of her, but
the gist of it is pretty easy to explain.  To put it simply, Ami had the
absolute worst luck with guys.  They always seemed to be nice at first, but
once they got what they wanted out of her (be it sex, money, or other
things), the relationship deteriorated until they broke up.  I happened to
show up mere moments after she had been dumped by her last boyfriend.  If I
was a violent man, I would have hit something.  It's guys like that who give
the rest of us a bad name (and you wondered what I had against Aoshima).

"On behalf of the decent half of my gender, I'd like to apologize for that
creep," I said as she finished.

She smiled weakly, and sighed.  "You're a nice guy, Chris."  You know, it
bothers me when people say that.  It's like it's unusual for a guy to be a
decent human being or something.  Go figure.

"Thanks," I said wryly, "I try."  We walked through the park in silence
until we came upon the small lake at the center.  Sitting down along the
rocky slope, Ami stared out into space while I demonstrated my prowess at
skipping stones.  Or rather, my lack of prowess.  After a few minutes, I had
decimated the ammunition within reach.  "So, you feeling better now?"

Ami started out of her trance, and blushed sheepishly.  "Yes, I am," she
admitted.

"Good," I said, and stood, helping her stand.  "Come on, I'll walk you
home."  I put myself half a step behind Ami as we walked, allowing her to
take the lead.

"Chris?" Ami asked softly, stopping.  She turned and looked at me hopefully.
"Can you do something..." she trailed off.

I arched an eyebrow at her.  "Godly?"  She blushed and nodded quickly.  I
sighed and summoned my armor, careful to leave off my weaponry, and careful
to leave on the trenchcoat.  "How about this?"  I froze time and walked
around to a few feet in front of her.  "Or this?"

She stepped back a step in surprise, and then began to giggle.  "Nice
armor," she snickered.

I looked down at myself.  "Hey, I happen to think it looks good," I said
defensively.  "Better than that chainmail and furs stuff some of the guys
have."  I decided not to mention Thrudr's chainmail bikini.  I adopted a
false French accept.  "Eet is ze biggest t'ing in Paris, no?"

Ami rewarded my joke with some bright laughter.  "Chris, I wish I had a
chance at a guy like you," she giggled, and then gasped.  "Oops."

Suddenly I felt the that little fountain of magic within me explode with
power, like a fire-hose at full force.  I felt my entire being filling with
the awesome energy, and I could see a column of light start to form around
me.  I was becoming a vessel for that power, and it flowed through my body
from the ground into the sky.  I began to cry out in a mixture of pain and
rapture, as I rose several feet off the ground, held by the incredible power
I was channeling.

As suddenly as it arrived, the power left me, leaving me feeling drained and
exhausted as I fell to the ground.  I felt like some part of me had been
taken with that power, and something even more inhuman was used to replace
it.  With a bit of bitterness, I realized I was now truly a god.  There was
no turning back now.

Ami was looking at me with fear and trepidation.  I weakly smiled at her.
"Wish granted."

***

I landed in the yard of the temple, and walked inside the main room.  I
found Skuld and Urd lounging on the sofa, watching some inane soap opera.
Without turning, Urd greeted me.  "Hiya, 'Niichan, how'd it go?"

Skuld turned and leaned over the back of the couch.  "Yeah, what did she
wish for?" she asked eagerly.

I sighed.  "Skuld, am I a martial artist?"  Urd turned off the TV, and the
two exchanged a look.

"Of course not," Skuld answered.  "Why?"

"Do I have a father who gets me involved with women at the drop of a hat?"

"Last I checked, no," Urd responded.

"Do I have women dropping out of the sky to live here?"

"If you'd like, I could arrange that," Urd grinned evilly, and then gave me
a quizzical look.  "What's this about, 'Niichan?"

"Then why," I growled in exasperation, "is my life turning into like Ranma
1/2 or Tenchi Muyo?"  At their confused looks, I explained the wish Ami had
made and the story behind it.  By the time I finished, Skuld was shaking her
head in disgust, and Urd was helpless with laughter.

"Oh, Oniichan," Skuld said in dismay.

***

"...so that's what happened."  I explained to Belldandy and Keiichi at lunch
the next day.  We were sitting in the cafeteria at NIT.  Lucky us, the place
was mostly empty at that time, so we were able to discuss sensitive matters
in reasonable privacy.

Belldandy had on a pained expression as I finished, and Keiichi was
unsuccessfully trying to stifle laughter.  "What are you going to do,
Oniichan?" she asked.

"What am I supposed to do?" I asked helplessly.  "I HAVE to give her a
chance, it's part of the contract.  Besides, it's not like I'm heading to
Heaven anytime soon.  As long as you're here, so am I."

"But what about Rachel?  I thought you liked her."

"I do," I admitted, "but lets be honest, we haven't even gone out yet, and
besides, Ami is a very nice girl."  I shook my head.  "To make it worse, Urd
did some checking.  Rachel's been touched by the wish too, because of the
way Ami worded it."  I sighed and explained further.  "She asked for a
CHANCE.  That means she has to be able to lose."  I groaned at put my head
in my hands.  "And to top it all off, she's HAPPY about it!"

Keiichi controlled his snickering and gasped for breath.  "And you used to
say you had trouble meeting girls..." he trailed off and looked over my
shoulder.

I felt a pair of soft arms drape over me and a head nestle into the space
between my neck and my shoulder.  "Hello, Chris, you miss me?" an
affectionate voice asked.  My mind decided to go on the fritz for a moment,
and I stammered a bit before answering.  Attractive girls do not do that to
me every day - I'm allowed to lose it.

"H-hi, Ami," I finally managed.  "You take classes here too?"

"Just visiting," she purred. "I wanted to see you."

As I sweated under her attentions, the words of Samuel Becket came to mind.
"Oh boy."