Ranma 1/2: Siblings
Episode 3

All Ranma 1/2 characters are owned by Rumiko Takahashi.  Viz owns the US
rights, and I'm using them without permission.  Don't sue me, I have no
money.

***

"A fair?"  Andrew asked incredulously.  "I haven't been to one of those in
ages!"

Nodoka nodded.  "Yes, it should be fun.  Akane, Nabiki, and Ranma are
going, would you like to go along?"

"Sure," Andrew said.  He ran up to their room, and quickly put on some
nicer clothes.  He ran back downstairs and flashed her a smile as he
followed the others out the door.  "Thanks...Mom!"  Nodoka smiled faintly. 
He was still having trouble saying that one word, but it was getting
better.

The four walked down to the fair, and Ranma and Andrew had a blast racking
up the prizes.  Akane looked on partially amused and partially irriated. 
"I can't take you two anywhere!" she complained.  Ranma and Andrew
exchanged a glance and laughed.

"Ranchan!"  Ranma's face lit up and Akane's turned dark at that cry.  Out
of the crowds an attractive woman dressed in men's clothing approached
them.  She had a bandolier accross her chest, with several small spatulas
in it.  Across her back she had a very large metal spatula.

"Hey, Ucchan!" Ranma greeted.  "Meet my brother, Andrew."  Ucchan looked at
the two young men in confusion.  "Long story," he told her.  "He's
adopted."  He quickly intoduced Ukyo to Andrew.  "So if you ever see a big
grey dog walk in your store, you'll know it's him."  He ducked the swat
from Andrew.

"I'm a WOLF, damnit," he growled at Ranma.  "And I prefer to refer to my
coat as 'silver'," he said loftily, then smiled at Ukyo while Ranma and
Akane snickered.  "Any friend of my brother's is a friend of mine."  Ukyo
smiled brightly back at him and echoed the sentiment.

"Ranma!  You come to fair to see Shampoo?"  This time Ranma's face went a
little pale, and Akane's and Ukyo's faces both turned dark.  Andrew watched
a beautiful purple haired girl come out of the crowds.  She wore a
form-hugging purple outfit which didn't leave much to the imagination. 
"Shampoo see spatula girl and violent pervert girl here too.  Who him?" she
asked, pointing to Andrew.  Ranma performed introductions, and in minutes
the three women quickly fell to their standard bickering.

"My, they get along," Andrew noted as him, Ranma and Nabiki walked on,
leaving the three behind.  "So Ranma, Nabiki was telling me you actually
have three fiancees?"  Ranma stiffened and nodded.  Andrew grinned.  "My
brother the Don Juan.  Can I have one?"

"What're you talking about?"  Ranma demanded, shocked.

"Hey, you've got two to spare.  Brothers should share and all that..." he
trailed off as he felt a sudden heat at his back.  Ranma looked over his
shoulder and paled.  "Those two wouldn't happen to be the other two, would
they?"  Ranma nodded.  "They're all right behind me, aren't they?"  Ranma
nodded again.  "I'm dead, aren't I?"  Ranma nodded again.  Andrew whirled
and smiled his best please-don't-kill-me-it-was-only-a-joke smile.

"Ladies!" he said, holding his hands up and backing away, leaving Ranma
behind as the three women advanced on him, their battle aura's showing. 
"There's no need for violence..."  *I'm going to die.*  He suddenly looked
over their shoulders.  "Hey Ranma, stop showing off your muscles!"  The
three women whirled to see a startled Ranma, still wearing his shirt. 
"Bye!"  Andrew ran off through the crowds, the three fiancees in hot
pursuit.  "Out of the way!"  He yelled. "Hot soup, coming through!  Come
on, people, MOVE!"

Ranma and Nabiki watched them disappear.  "Hot soup?"  Nabiki asked
incredulously.

"It worked, didn't it?"  Ranma shrugged and laughed.  "I hope they don't
hurt him too much."

The girls eventually returned, still mad since they were unable to catch
Andrew.  Despite the hostility between the three women, Ranma still managed
to have a good evening, and he, Akane and Nabiki came home late that night
in high spirits.

Ranma went to his room, and heard a knock in the window.  He opened it, and
saw Andrew hanging from the roof.  "Is it safe?"  Andrew asked.  "Does
Akane still want to kill me?"

"Nah, she's quick to forgive.  She might smack ya once in the morning,
though."  Andrew grimanced and climbed into the room.  "Big tip, bro: watch
yer mouth around them.  Ukyo will probably forgive you, but I think
Shampoo's out for blood."

"No kidding," Andrew replied.  "Short tempers your fiancees have there." 
He stripped down to shorts and an undershirt, and lay back on his futon. 
"Which one you in love with?  The cutest?"

"Akane is NOT cute!"  Ranma growled, and blushed as he realized what he
said.  "That was dirty!" he protested.

"Just checking," Andrew chuckled.  

Ranma grumbled and lay back on his futon.  "Hey, I meant to ask you, what's
your Kempo school?  It's alot like Anything Goes."

"Well, my sensei called it Organized Mayhem.  It takes the best pieces from
a bunch of arts and pieces them together into a kind of free flowing style,
it relies on speed and misdirection."  He fell silent a moment.  "Hey, who
taught you those moves, anyway?  I was told they were secrets of the
village I was in."

Ranma snorted.  "This old ghoul taught the Kachu Tenshin Amiguriken and the
Hiryu Shoten Ha to me.  She's Shampoo's great-grandmother.  The Moko
Takabisha is based on this move called the Shishi Hodokan that Ryoga uses. 
I'm not depressed enough to do it, so I use my confidence."

Andrew swore softly.  "I should have known they weren't secrets.  It's kind
of odd, though, I mean your blast has a tiger aspect, and your whirling
attack has a dragon aspect."

"So?"

"Well, I was trained to give both of mine Wolf aspects, since that's what I
turn into."  He was silent for a moment.  "I suppose it doesn't matter
since you change into a girl."  He laughed as the image of a girl-whirlwind
came to him.  "In fact, I'd say it's an awfully good idea."  He fell silent
again.  "By the way, can I punch the guys who say rude remarks about your
girl form?"

"Please do."

"OK, just wanted to make sure.  'Night, Ranma."

"'Night, bro."

***

It was Sunday, and the two families sat down to an excellent breakfast. 
Ranma and Andrew were still damp from their post-practice bath.  Nabiki
discussed some of the boys at school with Akane, enjoying her generally
negative reactions.  Soun and Genma ate quietly, enjoying the friendly
atmosphere.

Suddenly, the wall burst inward, reavaling a very angry purple-haired
amazon wielding twin bonbori.  "Andrew!  Shampoo kill!"  She thrust her
weapons at Andrew, who rolled out of the way.

Andrew lept out into the yard.  "Come on, Shampoo, it was only a joke!" 
Shampoo raced out after him, leaving large dents in the ground every time
Andrew dodged.

"Shampoo no joke about marrying Ranma," the amazon yelled, and attacked
harder.

"He's very good, son-in-law," Cologne said beside him.  Ranma yelped and
fell back.

"Damnit, don't do that!" he said, sitting up slowly.  He watched Shampoo
chase Andrew around the yard.  "Of course he's good.  I wouldn't let any
old sap be my brother."  

"Your brother?" Cologne asked, suprised, then slowly nodded.  "Ah, he is
adopted."  She suddenly cackled as she saw Andrew begin to lose his temper
and fight back.

"You know Shampoo," Andrew said as he weaved by an attack.  "I don't like
fighting girls, but in your case, I'll make an exception."  He quickly
counterattacked, knocking Shampoo back a few steps.

"Son-in-law, unless you want to share a fiancee with your brother, I'd stop
that fight."  Ranma paled and lept to his feet.  The sick feeling of dread
in his chest told him he was already too late.  He ran outside, just in
time to see Andrew knock Shampoo out.

"Andrew you idiot!" he screamed.  "Now she's going to want to marry you
too!"  Andrew froze, and shakingly walked over to Ranma, and grabbed the
other's shirt.

"She's an amazon?!"  Andrew demanded into Ranma's face.  Ranma nodded, and
the other let him go.  "WHY didn't you TELL ME?"  He sank to his knees and
screamed in frustration.  "I went through all that trouble to AVOID that!"

Cologne came out of the house to check on Shampoo, and Akane followed her,
and placed her hands in sympathy on Andrew's shoulders.  She smiled
impishly.  "Blame Ranma," she told him.

Andrew looked up at her, confused.  "Huh?"

"Blame Ranma.  Everyone else does.  You'll feel better."

Andrew stood, and faced his brother.  "RANMA, THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT!" he
roared, Ranma flinching under the verbal onslaught.  Andrew looked over at
Akane with a sheepish smile.  "You're right.  I do feel better."  His eyes
hardened, and he walked over to Cologne.

"Respected Elder," he began.  "I will not marry her," he said, wilting a
little under the elderly woman's implacable stare.  "I will fight to my
death before I accept a marriage I do not want.  I expect my brother feels
the same."

"I always liked a challenge, son-in-law," Cologne told him.  She picked up
her great-granddaughter and leapt out of the yard with her.

***

"I can't believe you!" Andrew said, exasperated.  "Why exactly did you have
to change into your girl form to eat ice cream?"

Ranma-chan sat at the table with the remains of several sundays before her,
busily finishing off another.  "Because," she said through a mouthful,
"guys don't eat ice cream like this."

"HUMAN BEINGS don't eat ice cream like that."  Andrew took a final sip on
his milkshake.  "Do you have any idea how ridiculous you look?  You weigh
maybe 50 kilos soaking wet like that, and you eat like a horse."  He
sighed, and paid the waiter.  "Last time I ever go out to eat with you. 
Come on, lets go, I want to go apologise to Ukyo."  He fingered a bruise on
his jaw, and winced.  "Considering Akane's and Shampoo's reaction to my
joke, I'd rather play it safe."

The two got up and left the restaurant, taking the back streets to
Ucchan's.  "Hey, Ucchan's OK," Ranma-chan told him.  "She won't hit ya or
nothin'."

"So says the master of understatement.  'Akane'll smack ya' he says, and
what do I get?  An uppercut that sends me flying 5 city blocks."

"Hey, you're lucky she likes you," Ranma-chan said, laughing.  "She knocks
Kuno into LEO regularly."

"Yeah, but he deserves it," Andrew reminded her.  He suddenly froze and
jumped straight up, as a handful of shuriken stuck into the ground.

"DIE SAOTOME!"  Upon a nearby wall, a young Chinese man wearing long white
robes stood.  He had some very thick glasses pushed up on his forehead.

"Mousse, you idiot, put on your glasses, I'm right here!"  Ranma-chan
bounded up onto the wall and decked the young man, who staggered back a few
steps.  Ranma-chan leapt straight up as a few chained weapons flew at him.

"Stay out of this, Ranma," Mousse cried.  "I'm here for the OTHER Saotome. 
One of you was bad enough, I will not stand for two of you!"

"Oh, he's right behind you," Ranma-chan told him.  Mousse whirled, and the
last thing he saw was the sole of a shoe before he was launched into the
air by a kick from Andrew.  Ranma-chan watched him fly through the air. 
"Nice form."

"Who's that twerp, and what did I do to him?"  Andrew asked, looking in
suprise at all the weapons on the ground.  "How the hell does he WALK with
all this stuff?  Even better, where does he KEEP it?"

Ranma-chan ticked off her fingers as she answered him.  "Mousse, he's in
love with Shampoo, I dunno, and I still dunno."  Ranma-chan picked up a
blade.  "He's a Hidden Weapons artist, maybe it's some secret trick."

Andrew groaned.  "Why do I keep on inheriting your problems?"

Ranma-chan laughed and pattered her brother on the shoulder, leading him to
Ucchans.  "Hey, you're not a Saotome til you've got an unwanted fiancee and
an enemy.  Besides, as you said, brothers share."

After a few minutes the two reached Ucchan's.  Andrew made his abject
apology while Ranma-chan gorged on a few okonomiyaki.  Aside from a rather
half-harted smack from Ukyo's battle-spat, she accepted the apology.  Soon
later Ranma (now male) and Andrew were walking back to the dojo.  "Not
bad," Ranma said.  "I'd give it an 8."

"This from the guy who's never said sorry in his entire life if what Pop
tells me is right."

"I have too!"

"Name one," Andrew challenged.  Ranma was silent for a very long time.
Andrew looked over at him, and laughed when he saw Ranma concentrating
heavily.  Ranma heard him laughing and lost his temper.

"So what if I can't remember?" he demanded.  "I know I've said it!"  He
took a swipe at Andrew, who dodged and ran off laughing.  "Why you....COME
BACK HERE!"  Ranma took off after his brother.

***

Ranma caught up with Andrew to see him stopped in the gate like a statue. 
"Hey, what's..."  he trailed off as he saw the devestation.  The yard was
ruined, and there were large holes through the house.  "What the HELL?"  He
ran into the house, Andrew right behind him.  Inside, they saw Soun sitting
in the living room, tears pouring from his eyes.  Genma-panda lay on the
ground, unconscious.  Seeing Ranma, Soun rose to his feet and grabbed
Ranma's shirt.

"RANMA! It's a disaster," he wailed.  "They're gone, all my daughters,
gone!  And your mother too!  My poor Kasumi! And Nabiki! And Akane!  What
am I going to do now?"  Andrew looked around frantically.

"M..mother?" he whispered.  "NO WAY!"  He ran into the kitchen, and came
out with some hot water, which he poured on Genma-panda, waking him up. 
"What happened?  Who the hell did this?"

Genma groaned and sat up.  "A very powerful artist.  He calls himself Lord
Shinzo.  He came in, saying a Tendo must be his bride, and took them all
away."  Tears began to stream from his face.  "I tried to stop him, son.  I
really did, but he was too strong."

"NOT AGAIN!!!"  Ranma yelled.  "I'll...I'll kill him!!!"  Ranma lifted up
the dining table, which had been overturned.  Under it he saw Ryoga, the
crap kicked out of him.  "Oh man, he trashed Ryoga too, this guy is good." 
He pulled a piece of paper from Ryoga's hand.  He read it and crumpled it. 
"Let's go, 'Drew," he said, his voice grim.  He kicked Ryoga lightly. 
"Come on P-chan."  Ryoga groaned and woke up.  He sat up, holding his head.

"Where?" Andrew asked, almost growling.

"China," he said.  Just then, Shampoo came running through a wall, and
stopped just short of glomping on Andrew.

"Aiyah!" She exclaimed.  "What happen here?"

"Another kidnapping," Ranma said shortly.

"Violent pervert girl again?" she asked.  "Shampoo not suprised."

"Not just her," Ranma snapped.  "Nabiki, Kasumi, and Mom!"

"Aiyah," Shampoo breathed softly.  "That bad...Shampoo go get
great-grandmother and Mousse.  We go rescue, OK?"  She turned to walk out. 
"Shampoo get spatula girl too."

"Shampoo," Andrew said softly.  "Thanks."

Shampoo nodded.  "Shampoo know how she feel if someone hurt her family." 


Notes:

Andrew's Attacks: Yes, they're alot like Ranma's, they're supposed to be.
Konton Irichen Seme = chaos series attack
-it's a bunch of very fast attacks where the attacker telegraphs one move
but strikes with another

Ookami Takabisha = Wolf Domineering
-Moko Takabisha with a wolf motif

Ookami Gufuu = Wolf Tornado
-Hiryu Shoten Ha